After Torah study, I asked a woman who's obviously an inveterate student if she would study Leviticus with me. Yes! We exchanged numbers. We'll start Tuesday the 26th and maybe I'll join her for a Biblical Hebrew class this Wednesday night, even though they started ten weeks ago and even though I'll have to go out after dark.
A chevruta! I've been looking for someone to study Leviticus with me forever and I finally found someone!
It was a wonderful/horrible morning.
So nice to be at a Reform Torah study. Sure there are fewer comments citing specifically Jewish knowledge, but there is a love of Torah and a respect for other human beings that is uniquely Reform. In a Reform setting, the exploration of text is also an exploration of life and values.
Near the end of class, I had a flashback. For the first time, I recognized it for what it was. Instead of the shame of the experience and the shame of having a mind that would return to it, I could hold the memory and look at it-- and, knowing it was only CPTSD, set it to one side (where it kept poking at me like my cat does when she wants a snack at 3 in the morning).
After Torah study and talking with Kilian (while pushing away the flashback), I found comfort in basar v'chalav and a potent beer at Tucson Tamale. And I realized why I'm having some trouble starting to keep kosher again; traif is my defense mechanism against pain.
When I got home, I dragged Nutmeg's new piece of cat furniture outside so we could both bask in the sun. She prefers my lap.
So sweet!
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