Journeys

It has been too long since I journeyed. Not sure what intention to set. I've already have an answer about Nutmeg.

How can I feel more centered and more accepting of uncertainty?
How can I feel more accepting of uncertainty?
How can I feel more accepting of uncertainty?

(or how about: how can I have more fun right now?)

How can I feel more accepting of uncertainty?

As soon as the drumming starts, I am standing beneath the arm of the saguaro
I ask, How can I feel more accepting of uncertainty?
I enter the wood pecker nest and travel down the trunk and short roots
Travelling through the tunnel at a moderate speed, but reach the cave immediately
Walk across the rocks to the river and the canoe is there
I get in and we float down the river
It's dark but I can see clearly
We pass the very small beach, go around a curve, and reach the underground lake
Instead of gliding toward the "pillars," the canoe stops

It asks me, without words, where I want to go
I picture Saguaro and we move forward
When we are under the volcano's narrow cone, I float up

It's daytime, but not extremely bright
I see Saguaro and walk down the side of the mountain a short distance to reach her
She's still growing from hardened black lava and there is still hardened red lava behind her
I say, Hi, and she bows slightly
I bow back

I feel terrible, mentally, emotionally, and physically. I'm so worried. How can I be more accepting of uncertainty?
Saguaro hugs me and there are no needles to hurt me
She very holds me very close and it feels wonderful
I say, I want to stay like this forever
She doesn't stop hugging me and we're very close, we have almost merged into one
We hug for a long time

Then we're not hugging any more
I'm standing in front of her, looking at her, waiting
She takes my hand and begins walking up the mountain, not toward the cone, but a little to the left
We're walking very, very slowly

I expect there will be more ocean, and there is
We continue walking, down the gentle slope on the other side
There are scrub bushes, dry, desert bushes that seem out of place
Saguaro picks a leaf for me to eat
I'm surprised that it's thick and succulent
I ask, So walking and eating will be good for me?

I want to swim and I think about flying to the ocean and diving in, but I stay with Saguaro
Saguaro touches me on the back and, without words, tells me to follow my impulses

I fly to the ocean and dive straight in
Good form, I say

I realize I have a mermaid's tail and I move it
It propels me through the water very fast
I pass a school of dark fish
I turn over on my back and can see Saguaro in the distance
The water's not smooth enough for me to just float and relax, so I go underwater again

As I move further out, I notice no other life
I wonder if I'll find seaweed if I go deeper
I don't like this-- no life, just like my first journeys to the lower world
I turn back and swim swiftly to shore
I wonder how I'll move on land with a tail and decide to just lie in the sand and waves

But I don't have a chance to do that; the drumming changes
I look up at Saguaro and wave
Then I fly up and to the volcano's cone
The canoe takes me back
The drumming is very slow and I move through the tunnel very slowly
But then, I'm standing by the saguaro and I say, I'm back.

(I wish I could record my sessions. Typing them up afterward is a chore I don't enjoy.)  

Journey

My intention was to ask Saguaro how I can help Nutmeg and Sophie the Dog become friends.

I went to the saguaro and looked at her and her new growth. Then I stood under one of her arms and dove into the woodpecker nest.

I traveled down her roots and through the tunnel to the cave. I noticed again that I didn't hear my feet walking across the fist-sized rocks or the water flowing in the river.

The canoe was there and took me down the river, through the darkness, past the tiny beach, and to the underground lake with its pillars. When we were under the volcanoe's cone, I looked up and saw stars and black sky.

I floated up and stood on the side of the mountain. I didn't recognize any constellations, but I wouldn't necessarily. I walked and slid down the side of the mountain to Saguaro. Even in the dark I could distinguish black lava and red lava rock.

Hi

Hi

My cat's moving in with a dog called Sophie. What can I do to help them get along, become friends?

Saguaro raised her (?! last time: he) arms to the stars and waved them about.
She was dancing in place with her face upraised.

You want me to pray?

You got it.

I spoke to Grandfather Sky, the stars of the lower world, Nutmeg's spirit, and Sophie's spirit.
And I prayed.

Since there's more time, will you tell me how to take care of my health? Lab work says I am very sick.

Before I finished speaking, Saguaro walked behind me and put her hands on my back.
She was vibrating.
Then she put my hands on my back and her "hands" on my shoulder, and we began dancing under the stars.
She spun me around and we kept dancing.
I saw myself in Israel, energetic, moving about. Perhaps dancing through Israel will heal me.
My dancing became quite vigorous as I stomped to the beat of the drum.

The stars darkened and we stopped dancing.
I should be looking toward the future. Should I stop writing about the past?

You want to write.

Yes. How can I write and still look forward?

Light a candle. Set a boundary of space and time.

Okay. Is there anything you want to show me while I'm here?

I thought she was going to take my hand, but she didn't, and then the drum rythm chaged.
I have to go. Thank you for answering my questions about Nutmeg, my health, and writing.

I rushed up the hill and dropped feet first into the volcano.
The canoe took me back to the river, and struggled upstream.
I stepped out of the canoe and I glanced upriver toward the grassy opening that I sometimes use when exploring the lower world.

The drumming stopped and I looked at the canoe and said, Thank you. I could see the turquoise designs on its side.
Then I ran through the cave, rushed up the tunnel, and was back.

 

No need to take it personally

The Jewish Agency and Nefesh b'Nefesh help or hinder potential olim entirely at random; there is no need for me to take it personally.

A Canadian couple's aliyah application was denied because they didn't provide birth certificates. The "husband was born in Kazakhstan in 1945 while his parents were on the run from Nazis. The wife was born in Czechoslovakia to Holocaust survivors in 1947." They don't have birth certificates.

A NBN representative stated, "It’s a Jewish Agency issue,” adding that she would try to help out.

If you believe that NBN will make any effort
on their behalf, you have never dealt with NBN.

Claim Your Power

Be here and grateful.
Bless the changes to come.

(Images from The Gaian Tarot)

Journey

I will meet Saguaro in the lower world and ask for healing.

I walk toward the saguaro and stand under one of her arms
I state my intention three times
Then I travel down her roots and through the tunnel

I reach the cave and walk to the river
I wait only a moment before the canoe appears
I sit in the canoe and we travel down the river, past the little beach, and to the underground lake

I float up to the opening of the volcano
I see only ocean and loose, black rocks
But again, it strikes me that this landscape is not lifeless as the first one was

I walk down the steep mountain side
The Saguaro stands on black, cooled lava
Behind him is red, but cooled lava
Somehow not out of place in this landscape
There are many green, non-tropical trees behind him
I approach and explain why I've come
Will you heal me?

Yes

I sit on the ground
For several moments, he does nothing
Then Saguaro raises his arms and points to my heart
White energy flows at my heart

My heart is a smooth, white stone
It vibrates as the energy touches it
Saguaro dances as he sends energy to my heart
My whole body vibrates
This continues for a long time

Then my throat fills with the energy
It feels swollen and painful

Saguaro continues to send energy to my heart and my whole body vibrates
My throat feels very uncomfortable, but I just accept the feeling
(I am aware of my body in ordinary reality and it feels very, very tired)

After a long time, Saguaro stops and lifts his arms
We talk briefly (I can't remember what we said)
Then he falls asleep

I stand and bow
Thank you

I look at the ocean and the rocky hillside
Then I look up and see a bird soaring
I float up, looking up at the bird and then down at the volcano
I decide to follow the bird
It circles out further and further, to the ocean and back over the Saguaro
I dive into the volcano

The canoe and I journey back to the cave

Thank you, I say, before traveling back to the other saguaro

Journey

I approached the saguaro, my entry to the lower world, and announced my intention to meet the spirit of Saguaro

The tunnel was completely dark
I traveled along it for a very long time before arriving in the cave

I couldn't see anything, but made my way to the river
I could sense the canoe passing
I waited for it to pass before walking up river

Suddenly I decided to travel downriver in the canoe
Stop!

I jumped in quickly
Laying on my stomach and facing forward, I traveled down river in the canoe

We reached the large, underground lake with its "pillars"
We traveled on the lake for a very long time
Then I looked up and saw sunlight

It was like and not like the top of a volcano
Only a little of the top was missing, the peak of the former mountain was still mostly there

I floated up, leaving the canoe behind

Loose, black, pumice covered the top of the mountain
The ocean was visible in the distance
I walked down
I didn't see plants or animals, but the place did not seem lifeless

Then I saw a Saguaro with two arms standing a little ways below
There were green trees behind it
I walked toward it

I've come to meet you. May I ask for a healing?

Yes.

What kind of healing can you give me?

It showed me a vision
My heart exploded like a volcano, for a moment it was a smooth white stone
I wondered

I don't understand, but I will think about what you've shown me
What kind of healing can I offer my saguaro, the one I call Asherah?

Offer her more root-beer. And bless her bees.

Really?

Offer her more root-beer. And bless her bees.

Okay. I don't understand what you showed me about my heart, but thank you for your time.
I'm going now.

I walked back up the slope of loose, black, stone

Stepped over the edge and floated down
The canoe was still there and we traveled back
I stepped out when we reached the cave and said, Thank you
I walked back to the tunnel and journeyed quickly back to the saguaro

Soul Work

Hermit:
Refresh your spirit and cleanse trauma from your body.
Seek guidance in Nature and wisdom in her creatures.

Four of Fire:
Draw energy from your surroundings and celebrate your body.
Find freedom of spirit and follow the example of Saguaro.

Together:
Blend Fire with Water and Water with Fire.
Travel through darkness, blend it with light.
Gift it to others.

(Images from The Gaian Tarot)