BaMidbar – In the Desert

5776. My first hopeful Rosh HaShana in over a decade. Recovery from something that I’ve never believed was traumatic enough to knock me on my ass. And yet, there I was, on my ass, and I couldn’t get up.

Why did “getting over it” have to take twelve years? At least it didn’t take forty!

There have been other signs of progress:

Months ago, I left my job and sold my house. Even though my plan to make aliyah was not working out, I entrusted myself to insecurity: it's a doorway, I hope, to a new life. I do not miss the house, only watching sunrise in the back yard, looking out at desert and mountains.

A few weeks ago, I visited Washington. Olympia seemed eager to press upon me many opportunities to build a full, new life. Those opportunities would have added up to a life I’ve already had. I want something else.

When I returned from Washington, I was overjoyed to be in the desert again. When did I become a lover of the desert?

I had thought that I missed abundant green and generous rains. In fact, I’ve learned to love bare earth, plants that thrive between rocks, bright flowers that appear for only a day, and clouds that are immense and fantastical landscapes in the sky.

I even love the tease of the monsoons: seeing a smear between cloud and horizon and knowing it’s raining “over there,” watching nearby rain evaporating before it reaches the ground, feeling three-minute long rolls of thunder, and waiting and hoping for rain to fall where I am.

Waiting and hoping. They feel good. And when the rain pours down: joy!

The knowledge that I have found my place is empowering. I am a toshevet midbar, a desert dweller. I will discover other parts of myself and, eventually, I will find my name.

There is no hurry. I want to take this journey.


Addendum: Tamara Cohn Eskanazi writes, "Wilderness is a place—or time—without orienting landmarks or structure." She asserts that the theme of B'Midbar (Numbers) is transition and that the book "charts the journey through a wilderness and attempts to create new structures in this intermediary space for future life in the land." 

U.S. Christians "Under Siege"

Church in Baghdad, from www.atour.com

On first hearing that statement, one might find it absurd. Middle Eastern Christians are being murdered because they are Christians, while American Christians exercise social, religious, political, and economic freedom.

However, it is a fact that America Christians are under siege. At one time, all branches of the federal and state governments were aligned with Christian mores. Today, Christians are losing that power.

Here is a well known example. Kim Davis, a clerk in Kentucky, has been incarcerated for refusing to issue marriage licenses after the United States Supreme Court ruled that gay marriage is legal. She tried to arrogate to herself the power to impose her beliefs on other people.

Sorry, Kim. The United States Constitution prohibits the government from imposing any religion or religious doctrine. For example: President Obama cannot write a prayerbook and compel your church to use it! Your position as a government official does not give you the power to impose your beliefs on other people.

Does it need to be said that comparing yourself to Martin Luther King, Jr. is laughable?

Christians in the U.S., from camphanes.org
(click to see suffering, Christian children in the U.S.)

It is ignorant to claim that the Supreme Court is a dictatorship hostile to Christians. It is ignorant to claim that states' law should supersede federal law. It is ignorant to believe that the words "man" and "woman" on a county form are divine command. And Mike Huckabee knows better.

The United States Constitution gives Christians many rights, including the right to tell their elected representatives to overturn the Supreme Court’s ruling.

Christians have rights and freedoms in the United States, but it's not the "good-ole days." Christian power is indeed under siege. This is a good thing for everyone.

Addendum: Here is a brilliant post on this topic from Shaun Paul at Stone of Destiny.

Post-It Notes

Do you sometimes scribble notes in the middle of the night, then read them in the morning and wonder what the fuss was all about?

I found one on my bedside table this morning that I think I’ll keep.

I only need to do three things: 
   walk 
   immerse myself in Hebrew 
   learn to love myself

זכרונו לברכה

I am very sad to learn of the passing of W. Gunther Plaut.

The Plaut Torah Commentary and the people I studied with every Shabbat morning were my dear companions and teachers for seven years.

During this last bout of insomnia, I have been spending the middle of the night reading the Plaut's Haftarah Commentary. (I'm a little amazed that I never read it before now.)

May Rabbi Plaut's memory be a blessing.

Immaculate Conception and Anti-Semitism

It seems that many people, even some scholars, do not know what the term "Immaculate Conception" means. It does not refer to Mary's supposed virginity.

You may think this is an odd pet peeve for a Jew to have, but stay with me.

The Christian belief that Mary was still a virgin when she gave birth to Jesus is called virgin birth.  Immaculate conception is an entirely different concept, one that is a necessary result of another Christian belief: original sin.

Early Christian theologians invented the doctrine of Original Sin and based it on a Jewish story to explain why it was necessary to worship Jesus rather than practice Judaism, a temptation apparently still faced by some Christians in the early Church. The doctrine asserted that, before Jesus, no one was "saved."

Christians invented the idea that the disobedience of Adam and Eve had caused all successive generations to be born with an ailment called Original Sin. They claimed that worshiping Jesus was necessary for one to be worthy of heaven. According to them, the Hebrew prophets, patriarchs, and matriarchs were dwelling in hell. Only people living after Jesus could have this original sin washed away. It required baptism... by a Christian priest, of course.

This new idea, Original Sin, created a problem in the minds of some Christians. Since Mary must necessarily have been infected with Original Sin, how could she have given birth to the son of god?

Christian theologians solved this problem with another new idea called Immaculate Conception. When Mary was conceived, god made sure she didn't catch the disease from her parents. Why god couldn't have done this for all people remains unexplained.

All these ideas were sufficiently convoluted to prevent most theologians from asserting their absolute truth. It wasn't until the middle of the nineteenth century, when the near-divinity of Mary was widely accepted by Catholics, that a papal bull commanded "all the faithful" to believe that Mary was conceived "without the stain of Original Sin."

So, the term Immaculate Conception does not refer Mary's chastity. It is the end result of one more idea that was invented to invalidate Judaism.

_______

As an aside, I must admit that I rather like statues of Mary and appreciate the inclusion of feminine imagery in religion.

So for a more complete and more sympathetic explanation of the concepts of "virgin birth" and "immaculate conception," as well as an appreciation of the divine feminine in Christianity, I'd like to point you to this article.